The Real Way for Men to WOW the Woman They Love

Guys, I know the struggle, you want to give her a gift that will thrill her, really show her how much you care for her. I am always trying to do this for my wife and it takes a serious game plan. I used to think it was a big dollar item that would really Wow her. I realize guys like to keep score, so on a scale of 1-10 a big dollar item thrills my wife a disappointing 5.

Now don't go and click away just yet. I am not talking about engagement rings, houses or cars. I am talking about that expensive diamond necklace she said she wanted. It's a nice piece of jewelry for her birthday in the $200-$300 range. Go ahead and get it and see what score you get'maybe a 6. Now her reaction may be quite vocal and excited but not a 10 on the thrill scale where she stops and looks at you in a way you never saw before.

I don't know if you study her reaction like I do, but after 19 years of marriage I have a mental log of reactions ranging from 1 to 10. I don't really keep score but use this terminology for the article. But men like to really knock her socks off, don't we? I will reveal a trade secret to you now, because I am tired of advertisements to the contrary, trying to convince you that if you REALLY love her you will buy her an EXPENSIVE piece of jewelry. Here it is? BUZZER -WRONG.

She may even think this herself, but she does not, deep down, BELIEVE it. I am not preaching trying to second guess her for a moment. I am trying to deliver the truth. Guys, what will really get her attention, is what you DO for her. For her, the gift you make has more MEANING. Since it has more meaning, it has more value to her. The meaning was invested by you and your efforts to thrill her. The sweat equity you put into something for her is your main gift to her. She will cherish the thought you put into it for her. Her thought, and reflection on what you did is why she is so thrilled. She is thrilled all of a sudden and like a ton of bricks it will hit her, but it won't go away. Your actual physical gift you made for her, will symbolize your intangible gift and remind her of it for years to come. This is the whole key.

Go ahead and go to the mall and pick up something for her on your way home from work. She will be moderately thrilled at perhaps a 6, and you go on with life as usual. You did your "duty" so she won't get upset with you for completely forgetting. Do yourselves a favor men, drop the charade. Picking up a gift at the mall is the easiest thing you could do and not a cost effective reminder to your loved one that you did not forget a special day for her. So now that I have lambasted an entire foolish notion and the thriving mall jewelry industry, what should you do? Make something for her. But, it takes a game plan.

Yeah, I hear the whining already. Planning. This is not something guys typically want to deal with for a Christmas, birthday or Valentine's gift. Planning, you know something the football team uses to make awesome plays and win the Super Bowl. Planning, the thing you put on your resume and do at work that makes you the big bucks. Planning, the management skill you reasonably present to your boss to justify your next big promotion. But no, planning is not for your wife or girlfriend's thrill factor? Yes it is. That is if you are striving to thrill her. So what is the plan?

Now, remember, you are putting in sweat equity here. You don't need lots of money. In fact you will blow the whole thing if you pull out a wad of cash and try to make the whole thing go away. This method does not work, you tried it already.

Target an end date. Say her birthday, in 3 months. You know how to back off her birthday three months right? OK maybe not. You do know when her birthday is don't you? So do your research then. Find out when her birthday is. Call her sister or something. Find out. OK now you have her birth date. Good start. Don't get peeved at me yet. I know I am digging into your ego here, SHE will thank you later. Just remember that! Now you have a 3 month window. Good start.

You have 3 months to execute your new plan. Here is what you do. So far you have spent 5 minutes remembering her birthday. Not to much trouble. Now find a top notch craft to make her that she will like. "She likes jewelry," you say? OK so make her some jewelry. "You aren't a jeweler", you say. "No problem", I say. I will now interview you for your new craft job to thrill her to no end.

Q: Do you know how to use pliers?

A: Yes

Q: Have you ever had a pair of pliers in each hand?

A: Maybe?

Q: If given two pairs of pliers and some open silver jump rings could you be persuaded to close these jump rings?

A: If shown how I think I could manage.

Q: If given a pattern for some Chainmaille Jewelry that shows you step by step how to make an intricate rare bracelet could you handle it?

A: The hand eye coordination I have gained from using video games has given me all the skills I need sir, consider me a fast learner.

Q: Last question, do you know how to surprise your wife by keeping a secret and making your jewelry project for her when she is gone for the afternoon?

A: Yeah, I can handle that too.

Q: Any questions for me?

A: Where do I get the plans and patterns to make this Chainmaille Jewelry? And how much will it cost me?

A: Wait a minute. I don't have any tools

Solution: Visit culturejewelry.com, we have what it takes to help you make your own chainmaille jewelry.

Matthew Woodbury, author and jewelry designer, comes from a family of jewelers, artists, writers, and engineers going back 155 years. He is showing how all that is necessary to put culture back into jewelry is to use your hands.