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All About Relationships
Set Your Relationship Up for Success
A quarter of thirtysomething couples are unhappy in their relationships, a new study shows. Just 51% of thirtysomething couples said they were "very happy" in their relationship, with the remainder saying they were "quite happy" but would like to see improvements. While it's good news that over half of thirtysomething couples are 'very happy', more and more couples are tolerating the state of their relationships and don't know how to get the results they want. Many of them complain that a lack of respect . . . keep reading
Never Ever Show You're Jealous
O.k., you're standing there all alone at a party and in the far corner of the room your boyfriend is talking to some groovy chick. She's coming onto him and much to your dismay, he doesn't seem to be bragging about all how happy he is in his relationship with you. In fact, he even seems to be encouraging and indulging the shameless slattern's disgusting, desperate, gall-filled pleas for sexual attention. So you a) burst into tears and run from the room b) go up to him and drape yourself around his neck so she can't miss the fact . . . keep reading
What's Up With Unconditional Love?
To tell you the truth, I'm a little disillusioned with the term unconditional love, lately. It's just not "natural". The phrase has been used for decades, by psychologists, therapists, A.A. types and the overall spiritually minded to describe how one should cope with impossible behavior." The original principle behind the concept, was to help the person who is being abused accept the circumstances and not have to live in a perpetual state of resentment towards their partner. You, as the codependent (ie the one who is always hurt) . . . keep reading
Cutting the Cord
Sometimes, after a relationship has ended, many of us have problems letting go. A lot of my clients often complain of feeling haunted or even possessed by the dearly departed (who probably isn't even thinking of you at all and is busy happily running away with his or her new partner.) It's like the person has left an indelible imprint upon your heart and many of us feel that we can't go on until the ex returns. The energy of the ex might be manifesting itself in all sorts of ways --- in what you perceive to be little omens or reminders . . . keep reading
Is Your Soulmate an Idiot?
Lately, I think people are investing too much energy in the idea that they "must find their soulmate." Where do we get this idea that we are somehow not complete unless we are connected to another person? What are you? An electrical outlet waiting for a plug, so you can finally light up the world? Frankly, when I hear the word "soulmate" I tend to give a little shudder, especially when I think about some of the people in my past that I have considered to be my soulmates. Quite frankly, most of my soulmates were idiots! The Buddha . . . keep reading
The Male Rating System
While not necessarily New Age in nature, Samantha has noticed a lot of clients asking questions about their potential beaus lately and she thought this refreshing change might be just what was needed to help our female Realm members keep things in perspective regarding their male paramours. Enjoy! -David - Believe it or not, if you go into forums on web sites that are devoted to the subject of how to pick up girls, you will find people posting messages about something that is called the mating rating system. Reading one of these . . . keep reading
It's a Gut Feeling - Finding love
Most single guys are settled in their life. Their mornings, afternoons and evenings have a routine they are comfortable with and rarely will they go beyond the boundaries of that routine. Even a single guy's loneliness can become his norm and if someone crosses his path that interest him, he rationalizes instead of trying to adapt. Many times this leads to confusion... he just isn't sure if she is the one. He over thinks, he pauses, rewinds, goes forward until nothing makes sense about being involved. Soon he is back to his comfortable . . . keep reading
Youve Been Dumped - Here's How to Get Over It
Weve all been there. We've fallen in love with somebody who just didn't love us back. We've heard a variety of exit lines: I think it's time we started seeing other people, I love you, but Im not in love with you, or It's not you. It's me. It's hard to accept when the other person just stops returning phone messages, but it's even worse when they keep calling after the break-up. Running into the object of affection in a public place is also a killer, especially if he or she gives mixed signals by making persistent eye contact. It doesn't . . . keep reading
A Kernel of Truth about Relationships: 4 Steps to Improvement
It's all about relationships! proclaimed my father during our recent holiday visit with my parents. Santa Claus coffee cup in one hand and a wagging finger toward my wife, Elizabeth, with the other. When you retire, that's what you realize is most important in life (okay, so that's not him in the photo). Dad recently retired from 30+ years as an orthopedic surgeon and the major shift in lifestyle seems to have brought about a significant shift in his outlook on life. For me, his statement about relationships became much broader and . . . keep reading
Cheating Wives and Cheating Husbands Give Different Reasons for Having Extramarital Affairs
Infidelity studies indicate that the percentage of cheating wives is fast approaching the percentage of cheating husbands wives. But the studies also reveal that men and women who are cheating on their spouses give different reasons to justify their extramarital affairs. The Top Reasons Men and Women Cheat The top 3 reasons men cheat all relate to sex. But sex is not usually the motivating factor for cheating wives. The top 3 reasons women cheat are tied to unmet emotional needs. Listed below are the reasons cheating husbands . . . keep reading
Slaying The Green Eyed Monster
He hasn't called in hours. You call and get the roommate: "Oh, sorry ....he got in really late last night and is still asleep!" Your mind starts racing: "What did he do last night?" Your heart starts to pound. You feel sick to your stomach.. Uh, oh... you're jealous. You feel like you can't live with yourself one more minute until you find out what is going on ... suddenly, the potential threat to the relationship becomes the most important thing in the world ... more important than eating, working or concentrating on tasks at . . . keep reading
Can We Still Be Friends?
Excerpt From The Relationship Handbook: How to Understand and Improve Every Relationship in Your Life by Kevin B. Burk Even when we know it's time to end a romantic relationship, we're often reluctant to let go of our partners completely. We've shared so much of our lives with our partner, it seems almost callous to simply cut them out of our lives- especially if we're ending the relationship on good terms. It's natural that we want to hold onto the loving and supportive part of the romantic relationship, and simply let go . . . keep reading
Extended Family Relationships: Staying Friends with Former Lovers and Spouses
Excerpt From The Relationship Handbook: How to Understand and Improve Every Relationship in Your Life by Kevin B. Burk It's natural to want to maintain a relationship with our former romantic partners (assuming that the relationship ended on reasonably good terms, of course). We shared a special bond with them, and they touched our lives and contributed to our sense of self in ways that we cannot even begin to describe. Just because the romantic and/or sexual aspects of the relationship have ended, why shouldn't we include . . . keep reading
Typecasting, Candice Bergen and Family Relationships
I'm experiencing some challenges in my relationship with Candice Bergen. I recently started watching Boston Legal on Sunday nights, because Candice Bergen had joined the cast. (She joined the cast so that more people like me would start watching Boston Legal on Sunday nights.) Like most Candice Bergen fans, I mainly associate her with her character on Murphy Brown: tough, smart, funny, sharp, no-punches-pulled, slightly over-the-top, and definitely not someone you want to have angry with you. Even the Vogue editor she played . . . keep reading
Why Anger is Essential to Healthy Relationships
Many of us have some very definite ideas about anger. We see anger as destructive and hurtful. We consider it to be an inappropriate response. We equate anger with violence. In short, we feel that anger is simply wrong, and that when we experience anger, there's something wrong with us. Anger isn't nice. Anger isn't polite. And anger certainly isn't our friend. Anger can be all of these things. But anger is also useful, necessary and even healing. We need our anger. We simply need to learn how to express our anger in appropriate . . . keep reading
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The Five Minute Relationship Miracle
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Lifelong Partners, Lifelong Growth
Many people, maybe even you, think there is only one life partner for each of us in our lives. I've got good news... we all have many, many life partners. A life partner doesn't have to be a romantic partner. A life partner is anyone with whom you share long term growth, internally and externally. Relationships . . . keep reading
Can You Become A Better Friend After Taking A Friendship Quiz?
Q. Does a friendship quiz really work? A. That depends upon what results you are seeking from a friendship quiz. If you are seeking to learn how to become a better friend, then the real results are found more in understanding the lessons that are hidden in the question rather than trying to pick the . . . keep reading
Relationship Advice: The Me Approach or the We Approach
A husband and wife were doing a little redecorating and rearranging one weekend morning. They were having an especially hard time pushing a dresser through a hall way door. About to give out, he exclaimed, "As hard as we push I don't think we'll ever get this dresser out of the . . . keep reading
Relationship Advice for Women - Beyond the Happy Ending - Part 1 The Nothing Syndrome
We've all heard the stories. The princess finds her prince and lives happily ever after. From childhood, girls are led to believe that you find your man and have your own happy ending. Our man will take care of us, adore us, treat us like the princesses that we are. It's no wonder that our first relationship . . . keep reading
Coping with Your Difficulties in Yourself
Ashleigh Brillant once said" "Coping with difficult people is always a problem, particularly if the difficult person happens to be yourself." Can you identify with this statement? Often, when things are not going well, we wonder what the problem is. Often we are the problem. We become our own worst . . . keep reading
Office Nomance
Are Office Romance's really that bad? The answer is?..it depends on the individual. The key to success in an office romance is accepting the reality of the situation. Some relationship experts say if you engage in this type of relationship, you should keep it on the hush hush and keep it professional . . . keep reading
Relationship Advice: Who Are You and What Have You Done with My Spouse?
"When we marry, we don't marry one person, we marry three. The person we think they are, the person they really are and the person they will become as a result of marrying us." This quote has much to say about the process of intimacy and marriage. The person we think they are When . . . keep reading
Rhubarb Romance: A Little Honey Works Wonders
Spring is in the air. It is a time of new life. There are green grass, kittens, puppies, and rhubarb . The darned stuff is the first thing to show up in the garden. For those of you who don't know about rhubarb, it grows from a huge root ball under the soil. A mass of stalks shoot . . . keep reading
Relationship Problems Begin With Poor Communication
Many relationship problems often begin with poor communication. Many couples often feel that their partner should know what they are thinking and do not communicate their thoughts and wants to them. When couples start to experience poor communication in their relationship this is when relationship . . . keep reading
What Men Want From Women
Actually, it's pretty simple. Deep inside the heart of every man is a secret wish to be trusted. How many times have men said to their wives, "If you would just trust me." Many men wonder why it seems so difficult for their wives to do something so seemingly simple. The answer stems from . . . keep reading
Your Relationships Begin With You
As a single male in my mid-twenties, I find myself consciously and unconsciously thinking about and searching for that special someone. My goal has always been to be friends with my future wife for at least a year, date for a year, engaged for a year, which includes being married by the time I'm thirty . . . keep reading
Bring Back the Cilice Belt
Among Dan Brown's many accomplishments is bringing the cilice belt to popular attention. Silas, Brown's tonsured hit man in "The Da Vinci Code", wears one and also flagellates himself with The Discipline, a knotted rope. The image of this tall, albino monk performing 'corporal mortification' is a . . . keep reading
Pen Pal Romance
We have all heard the wonderfully romantic stories of pen pals that wrote to each other for years without meeting because they lived hundreds or even thousands of miles apart. Some friend of a friend set them up as pen pals or she decided to write to some unknown soldier away at war . . . keep reading
Reading Each Others Mind
I cannot tell you how many times I have heard couples express the fact that they felt their partner should be able to read their mind. Have you ever felt this way? Such thinking can lead to disappointment, sadness, and yes, at times, even anger. In order to overcome this, we must be much more specific . . . keep reading
Great Relationships: How to Get the Spark Back
Losing the spark - simply, if you will, falling out of love - is a natural and widespread phenomenon in long-term relationships. As a matter of fact, most of these relationships experience an ebb and flow that is quite normal and to be expected. The problem, as I see it, is that most of us . . . keep reading
Are You Looking for Ms. Right or Mr. Not so Wrong?
Do you want to find the "love of your life?" It's not easy to find Mr. or Miss "Right". And how do you know if you're right when you think you have? The chilling fact is 75% of marriages end up unhappy, separated or divorced. The stakes are high, yet the tools to help you make the right decision have . . . keep reading
Don't Avoid Conflict and Confrontation with Your Spouse
"I just let him handle things his way." "We're not very good at resolving problems, so I let it go." "I just hate confrontation!" Listening, talking, communicating, resolving problems, making joint decisions... these are requirements for all couples. Without good communication skills and quality . . . keep reading
Relationship Advice: 2 Beliefs for a Successful Relationship
Mark Twain once said God's great cosmic joke on the human race was requiring that men and women live together in marriage." Considering the difficulty of living with another person day after day and the incredibly high divorce rate in this country, the humor of the quote begins to fade. One of the . . . keep reading
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